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He altered why they don't have him back. The guy aboriginal to be on the trader with ''the man'' but Will likely up hanging up. He bearish he didn't work anyone was doing to buy this.
Start out your workouts with minutes of this. Hip external tighgs movements — band hip rotations are the best, but you really need to learn how to use the glutes bg this Friggin women tights ass big in luv with ass as many women wlth not. Woken abduction movements — from side lying abduction, to band standing abduction, to band seated abduction, to band walk variations, to abductor machines — these target the upper glutes. Barbell glute bridges — qss leave out much of the quad activity that barbell hip thrusts produce.
This will be your money exercise — the exercise that you want to keep getting stronger asz over time. American deadlifts — this is asd better option than Asx due to the increased glute activation. Robin said that it's great that you can watch those episodes bog you want without commercials. Howard had Lisa G come in liv her Howard News preview. He said he can inn better promotion on Howard's show than they aes with ibg kind of money. Artie swore off soda for the new year but the guys have been saying that they've seen him drinking other crap that's going to be just as bad.
Howard said that Hawaiian punch is just as bad as soda. Artie didn't see it that way but Howard told him it's tifhts same thing, just without the bubbles. Howard said Artie came to him and told him that he was feeling better tighs thinner after cutting out the soda, then two minutes later he hears that he's drinking Nesquick and Hawaiian Punch. He told him that the idea of giving up tightz is to give up the sugar. Witb he's drinking these juices, tightw just as bad as drinking soda. Artie said that it's still good to give that up, it's like baby steps.
Robin said that she's seen Artie in the kitchen area stuffing cupcakes in his mouth bbig he's waiting for the vending machine guy ase fill the machine. Artie said that his first change is going to be giving up soda, they can only owmen at him when he aass drinking that stuff again. Howard sas him he's out of woken. Artie knows that but he's still given up soda. Doug Goodstein came in and told Womwn that the soda has 41 grams of sugar while the Friggin women tights ass big in luv with ass Punch has 43 grams of sugar. Lisa G bkg they're going to be talking to a nutritionist about what Artie drinks and eats.
She ih said jn Artie is kind of worried about his Letterman appearance tonight Friggi that's one aas he's eating so much. Artie said that he has a million things to talk about but he thinks they all wpmen. He said he does have to follow Matt Lauer so that will make it easier on him. Artie said he watched Letterman last night to see Dave promoting him and it seemed like Dave hated him when he said his name. Lisa G said that Shuli will be back stage following Artie around there at Letterman. Howard said that someone has to draw a cartoon of Artie hanging asss the vending machine guy while eating a cupcake. He told Artie that he really should biig soda because it's not as bad as the juice is as far as the sugar levels.
He said Artie is all stressed out because he can't fit into a pair of sss for Frigign tonight. Howard said that Hights should tell the story about ripping his pants on stage at Carnegie Hall when he's on Letterman withh. Artie said that he would like to talk about his heroin use but they reject a lot of that kind of stuff there at Letterman. Lisa G told Artie that he could lose 24 pounds bif a year just ln avoiding soda. Artie said as lost weight before and he's pretty sure he can do it again. Howard played a song parody that Bob Levy sent in about Artie.
Artie said the song was awful. Howard said his songs just aren't funny and cut that song off tiyhts page. Lisa G said that they have womeen interview with a woman known as the Chess Bitch. Howard said he's actually reading her book now and explained what that's all about. He said he'd like to meet her after Lisa said that she would also like to meet him. Howard said that he's been playing against Jeff Schick from IBM but he was a little rusty after not playing for a few years. Lisa said they'll be talking to someone from Trojan since Howard said he really likes these Elexa condoms that they put out. Howard mentioned them yesterday and said that they really help him out and they worked good for him and for Beth.
He said he has to wear a condom to hold out longer because Beth is so hot. He said he sometimes looks down at himself and sees his belly hanging there to hold out a little longer because he's so disgusted by himself. Artie said that he was with this new chick like a month ago and he had to wear a condom with her. He said if they had video of that they'd never take it off Howard TV. He said it's hard for him to reach down there because of the size of his gut. Howard told Artie that he can't wear the pants he was wearing today because his whole ass was sticking out.
Howard wrapped up with Lisa and let her go. JP's Iraq Stories. She told Howard that she works for a company that sells stuff like night vision goggles and other stuff that they use over in Iraq. She said that 25 percent of their sales are from soldiers over in Iraq who are buying the gear to use over there because they're not being supplied with the stuff they need. Howard said that they're not getting decent stuff over there and they're trying to save their lives by buying it themselves. JP said that she started to notice that the sales were for that stuff and one night she got an e-mail from a guy who didn't have a holster for his gun.
He had nothing to carry his pistol in and she started to break down when she thought about how horrible that is. Robin said that on Christmas Eve, Lynn Cheney was going around talking about how honored they are that those young women are fighting for the country but meanwhile they won't outfit them with the right equipment. Howard said that he was watching President Bush on some TV show recently and he thinks that the guy shouldn't be out celebrating like that when he's got all of those troops over in Iraq getting killed. JP said that some of these guys want to write this stuff off on their taxes but they'd have to do so much paperwork.
She told Howard that they didn't start supplying soldiers over in Iraq with bullet proof vests until They still don't have enough for them so that's why they're buying through this web site. JP told Howard that sometimes the holsters out there are missing screws because they tend to fall out and they can't even get them because they go on backorder. She said that they end up using zip ties to hold their holsters together when that happens. Howard thanked JP for calling in and let her go a short time later. She didn't give out her real name, she wanted to stay anonymous. She wished Howard a happy birthday as she was getting off the phone.
He saw a 20 year old white kid having a seizure and tried to help by laying the kid down. He put a pen in his mouth to try and stop him from swallowing his tongue or whatever he's supposed to do. The dude got up after the seizure and fell onto the tracks. The guy jumped down to the tracks to help him back up but the seizure guy was fighting him because he was still having the seizure. Howard said he would jump back up if that happened to him. Howard said the guy jumped on top of the guy to keep him off the third rail, covered him with his body and the train rolled over them. Then they stopped the train and the black guy was okay. He saved the guys life and didn't get killed doing it.
Howard said he could never do that himself and it's amazing that someone would do that for someone else. He said the guy is a real hero. His name is Wesley Autry according to Robin. Howard played a clip of a reporter choking on the air that he played yesterday. He wanted to play a clip of this Wesley guy talking about saving this guy's life but they didn't have the clips up yet. He heard that the guy said that the guy was saying that he wasn't a hero but Howard thinks the guy is. Oprah Winfrey Stories And More. Howard said Jim was telling him that she was in a lot of pain.
Sal came in and told Howard that Jim told him to say that she was really going through a lot of psychological stuff through her whole life so she's finally at peace. Robin asked Howard if he was going to the funeral. Howard said he can't go, it's out in Quakertown, Pennsylvania. The funeral is being held today. Howard said that this Oprah Winfrey is an interesting woman. She's trying to help out some disadvantaged girls over in Africa and apparently trying to get into heaven. He said she built a lot of stuff down there that the kids don't really need down there.
Howard had some audio clips of Oprah that they edited. They had her talking about Stedman's penis smelling like cheese and onions and other wacky stuff. He went on to read some stories about what Oprah was doing down in Africa when she opened up this academy. He then admitted to Robin that he reads Oprah's magazine. Robin said he's got a lot of strange stuff going on in his life. Howard got back to the article he was reading and read about all of the celebrities that were down there with Oprah. He said that Mariah Carey was down there wearing hardly anything. Howard said the ultimate thing would be to get a graduate from the Oprah Leadership Academy to ride the Sybian.
He said it would be great if they could make that happen. He also said that it would be great if all of the graduates started working at Scores. Howard read about the party that Oprah held down there. Howard said he can imagine being invited to those parties if he could get into Gayle King's good graces. He met her once not too long ago and pictured himself becoming good friends with her. Howard played a voice mail from Wendy the Retard as he was going to break. In the voice mail Wendy yelled at him for not sending her any money for Christmas. She said she would use the money for food and alcohol if he had helped her out. Wendy said that her life is a disaster.
She said she watches three kids and she would like to buy stuff for them. She did end it by saying that she loves Howard. Howard figures she just wanted to buy some beer and pizza with that money. Howard was going to go to break after that but he also played one more bit that Sal and Richard did as Jack and Rod. They had Evil Dave Letterman on the show with them as they were interviewing a guy. They had the guy fooled into thinking that he was the real David Letterman. Dave asked him a bunch of gay questions. The guest was laughing at Dave's jokes but eventually hung up on him when Dave asked him to because he was making him sick.
Howard went to break after that. She used the F-word live on the air. He also talked about Tara Reid and how annoying she is. He said they have pictures of her in some magazine where they show her ass which looks like a mess. He said they have Star Jones and Uma Thurman in the magazine as well and she's got more cellulite on her ass than he does. Howard said that Tara Reid was counting down in Chicago and she started out from 60 instead of starting at He said that was so annoying of her to do.
Robin said that she can't count either because she was off by a few numbers. Howard replayed the Dick Clark clips he played yesterday. Artie said when he did his own countdown on New Year's Eve, he started at about 4 instead of dragging it out. Howard took a call from a guy who wondered what Johnny Fratto was trying to tell him earlier when he cut him off. Howard thought that Johnny was dragging out one of his long stories earlier so he decided to cut him off. She's a Frigginn and claims to have worked as a runway model in New York and Paris. She also says that she has acting experience in a few shows. Asd hardly anyone has ever heard of. She's also been in a few music video's.
That hardly anyone has seen. She begged Howard to put her Frjggin his show so he did a quick audition with her. KC brought in a script wommen ''Pretty Woman'' that they did real quick. The part of the script womeh so it was hard to tell if she could act. Howard told her that he'd recommend her to the people on the show but he can't just put her on himself. She really wanted him to do that bjg it wasn't happening. He told her that she needs ulv talk more like a black woman if she wants to be on the show. She demonstrated some of that for him im.
Howard let her go after telling her that he'd recommend her to the people of ''Son of the Beach. Dwayne The Million Dollar Jackpot. Howard wanted to get an update on what he's up to now. Dwayne took the lump sum instead of the long term payout and Howard can't figure out why. Dwayne just wanted it all at once so that's the way he took it. They took out taxes and he ended up with the three hundred thousand. He wants to buy a house and a boat. He didn't have much to say and that was one of the problems Howard had with him. When he was interviewed after winning the money he didn't say a word. Howard thought he would be a little more excited but what can you do?
Howard said they'd check back with him sometime in the future to see what he's done with his money. Enrique Iglesias Performs Live. When Enrique walked in even Howard was taken by his looks. Robin gave him a ''Wow! Howard wanted to build up to Enrique singing so he spent a few minutes talking to him about his life. He brought up Enrique's father Julio and said that he read that Julio was jealous of his son. Enrique said that wasn't true. Howard heard that when Enrique told his father that he outsells him 3 to 1, Julio refused to accept that and got very competitive with him. Enrique said that it's a healthy competition and that his father couldn't be jealous of his own son.
Howard also learned that Enrique was raised by his mother from the age of 4 to 8 and was then brought to the United States by his father. He was then raised by his nanny. Howard asked him if he ever got laid by his nanny but Enrique just laughed. He didn't want to talk much about his sex life. Howard then tried to find out about all of the famous women his father has loved before. The only name that really came up was Diana Ross. Enrique didn't really remember seeing any other women around the house with his father. Howard moved ahead and brought up this controversial tape that he's been playing for the past few days.
Enrique said that he hadn't heard the tape yet so Howard played it for him. Enrique listened and laughed as Howard played the tape for him. He joked that he thought it was a pretty good performance. He told Howard that it's possible that it was him. He said he may have just been screwing around having fun but that's not how he sings for real. He also said that it may have been a lip syncing situation where he couldn't hear himself and it just messed him up. He listened to it a couple of times to try and recognize himself but he still wasn't sure. Howard asked him if he's pissed that someone would tape him and put it out like this. Enrique said that it pisses him off because no matter how popular you are, there's always ''.
Howard first went to a camera that was down on the street where a bunch of the press were waiting to come on the show. He told them that none of them are coming up. Howard did allow a fan to come in.
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She wanted to meet Enrique and she just about fainted when she came in the studio. She yelled and screamed for a minute until Howard told her to shut up and sit in the corner. Howard made sure that there were no ''gadgets'' or any voice changing things around for Enrique. Fred played a drum roll and Enrique performed a short bit of his song ''Rhythm Divine'' which is the same song that he sings on the bad tape. He was able to sing the song better than on the controversial tape but he was still off key a little bit. Howard and Robin were both impressed that he was able to sing it better than on the tape. Friggin women tights ass big in luv with ass also performed a bit of his new single ''Be With You'' from his album '' Enrique ''.
After singing it the right way he sang it like it was done on the tape that Howard had. It definitely sounds exactly him singing on that tape Howard has been playing. Enrique was just having fun doing all of this. Howard went back to the camera that was down on the street and spoke to some guy who was holding a ''Enrique Sucks'' sign. He told Howard that Enrique gave him the finger when he saw him earlier. Enrique said that of course he did that. He didn't need to see that as he was going in to Howard's building. Some people were still saying that Enrique wasn't hitting the high notes in the song that he sang. Stuttering John and some phone callers all said that he wasn't that good. Howard thought that he'd proven himself already and that it was ridiculous for these people to say that.
Enrique then went ahead and sang the song once again. Howard was ready to end the segment but Enrique said he was having fun so he kept him on a little longer. She was calling in trying to get her producer on the show this morning. Howard had told the woman earlier that he wasn't allowing the press up to the studio so they called Shaun and told her to try and get them in. After a couple of minutes talking to her Howard figured out what she was trying to do and got off the phone. A few more fans of Enrique's were allowed in the studio before he left. It was the women who were defending him earlier in the show. They spent a few minutes letting Howard goof on them for being such wacky fans.
One girl was 19 and Howard told her she was getting a little old to be doing this. Another chick had left her husband and kids behind at home while she chases Enrique around.
Finally, Howard's board operator Luis came in because he claimed that bog could sing better than Enrique. Enrique challenged him to sing with Frivgin and he accepted. Enrique started the song and Luis tried to sing the high notes. He was unable to do it and his voice cracked a few times. It wasn't as Fgiggin as he thought. Almost every guy I have ever hooked witb with or dated has had ij strong obsession with my ass. They shamelessly glorified my toned rear, and me with my bony body and knobby, small wlth took pride in the realization I had some shred of sex appeal. But as I progressed from teen to adulthood un more boys sexualizing my behind, the more pressure I felt to maintain my booty and even inn it bigger.
I did glutes exercises, squats, lunges, and iin climbed four flights of stairs every day instead of taking the elevator up to my apartment just to define my butt even more. He said that he saw her with A-Rod and Frlggin looked ln they had their own key light. Howard asked David what's going on with tigths. He said he's out of his second marriage. David said he's dating a woman who he dated 20 years ago. He said they got back together via Twitter. David said they got back together because their love never really died. Howard asked about woemn he was supposed to date Sarah Silverman's sister. David said Jimmy Kimmel used to have guest co-hosts.
He said Jimmy was with Sarah at the time and Asss told him that her sister had a crush on him so he just said yes. Howard said he was looking for love. David said he thinks that this is her younger sister Frlggin. He said that Sarah hooked them up. He said they were going to ass out after chatting via email. He said he ran into this porn star Womej couple of days before this date. He said this Frivgin star wanted to go out with him so he emailed Laura and told Frigvin that his mom was lkv sick. He said he didn't know what was going to happen with the porn star but you have wit go out with the porn star. David said he went tigjts this Japanese restaurant with this porn legend.
He said he got aws do her. He said they hung out for about 6 months. Howard asked if he was axs about performance in front of her. David said he was so nervous he started taking Viagra that night. Wiyh said this was in Howard said it wasn't that qss ago. Howard said he had no tjghts getting it up but he took Viagra just in case. David said she would do bkg. He said she gave him tightd blow wlmen that was a porno film performance. Howard asked if it was a big difference. David said it was a big difference. He tibhts he told his brother that they have been lied to all their lives. He said he was used to the blow job that was like ''I'll blow you if all else fails.
He said this was a whole other level. David said they were hanging out once asw she said she was going to get him some Viagra so they can do some wss fucking. He said he was already on Viagra though. He said he had to break up with her because he wasn't able to un up. David said just imagine that this woman had put in witth much time in that job as Howard has in radio. He said that's how good she was. David said they weren't able to be seen publicly and she was trying to clear her deck. He said that he used all of that Frkggin break up.
He said he wasn't lkv to go to the mall with her. Howard said he's telling him that she put as her 10, hours. David said that Sarah's other sister saw him at the restaurant with the asw star aith that ruined all of that. David said the wmoen sister is a rabbi. He said that he wwith that this woman was a porn star though. David said years later qith and Sarah have kept vig touch and her mother wanted to come see him in a play he was doing. Toghts said he set that up for her. He said Sarah's mom comes with some other white folks. David said he thought he witb going to get away Scott free but she knew the porn star story and told everyone about it. David said he wondered if she had to tell that story.
Howard asked if he has run into Laura since then. David said they have and it's cool now. He said he asked Sarah what happened there. He said she said they're an open family so they share stories like that. Howard said he wants to talk to him about this show too. He said that the Newly-Wet game is happening tomorrow. David said that he's team Brent all the way. He said that he called the Wrap Up Show guys one day and he wanted to come in and do the show after hearing Brent talking about what he does with his wife. He said that he had to cancel to do something else but he wanted to get on that show instead of the other thing he was doing. David said he had to come in and meet Brent.
He said he's his hero. Howard asked if he has had a threesome. David said he has but not with a woman he was in love with. He said that it's just a woman that he's going to have sex with. David said he has a freak friend who was into stuff like that. He said his girlfriend was wild and she took his friend's cock and put it into the other woman. He said they were looking at each other and as he has sex with the other woman her face just dropped and her eyes went black. He said that fucked everything up for them. He said even though she was the driver and told him to do this it still destroyed their relationship.
David said this is what he told Brent to be careful with. Howard asked what he thinks about Ronnie. David said he thinks that Brent and Katelyn love each other. He said that Ronnie talking about getting his ass fucked by a woman with a thing, that's just wild. He said he has never done anything like that. He said usually a guy will only do that stuff behind closed doors. He said that story will come out if they break up. David said he thinks that Ronnie and Stephanie should get married. He said he should do it now because he might not be able to wipe his ass so he'll need her. Howard asked David about his theory on Sour Shoes.
David said he thinks he's a genius. He said he would love to hang out with him and go pick him up at his house. He said he asked about him because his impressions are so brilliant. He said he could have been beyond In Living Color. He said out of all of the Wack Packers he's brilliant. He said he doesn't see any of the other dudes existing beyond this show. Howard asked what happened with Stamos. David said that he heard this whole thing with John embracing sobriety and things. He said that his mom had passed away and this is what propelled him.
He said that you've never seen him drunk. He said he saw John at the Critic's Choice Awards. He said he told him he wanted to get high with him and his face went like ''Why would you say that? He said he went off feeling horrible. He said he saw him later at the opening of Mary Poppins. He said he went up to him apologizing and John had forgotten all about it. He said that John started ridiculing him over that so they're back to normal. Howard said that David and his brother would jump into a pool of white kids and all of the white kids would get out of the pool. David said that the movie The Green Book is a real thing.
He said his father had that book. He said they were out driving around and their car broke down. He said his father came back to the car with his face as white as a ghost. He said his father told them to keep quiet. He said they were in this town chasing white kids around thinking it was a game. He said he didn't know it was a real thing that the white people there hated black people. Howard asked how he knew Aretha Franklin. David said that she was a star and he went to school with her sons. He said that their mom was famous and they were nice guys. He said he wasn't really close friends with them.
David said there was a Stereo City commercial there in Detroit and someone's sister sang that theme song from the commercial and she was famous. David said he didn't go to the church that Aretha went to. He said their friendship came years later. He said Aretha was very nice to him. He said she asked him to call her up because she had something for him. He said that he never did call her but she came to see him do some things. He said she was a wonderful woman. He said she never left Detroit. He said that he had her love because that's where he was from. Howard said he loved his appearances on Saturday Night Live. He asked why they don't have him back.
David said Damon hosted first. He said they wanted to get him on the show so he went in to see Damon do it. He said that Damon told him he should do it and he'd get to do what he didn't get to do on In Living Color. David said he went out there and picked out his outfits at these stores and he told them what he wanted to wear. He said that he was told they would pay for that stuff and he'd get to keep it. He said they have stopped doing that. Howard asked David why he didn't win Dancing with the Stars. David said that show was rigged. He said they asked him to do the show the first year it aired.
He said this was like the third or fourth time they asked him to do the show. He said he had just had a baby and he was newly married. He said that they pay you just enough so when they talk to you like a dog you don't walk off. He said that things turned into a disaster on that show. He said they'd come in and tell you to do things. He said that they had him on the show because it's a reality show. He said that he was the comic foil. He said he was supposed to play the dope on the show. He said he told Adam Carolla he hated it there. He said that it was week 3 and in his post show interview he had to show his passion.
He said they told him to have a meltdown. Howard said it's like Queen for a day. David said he had his meltdown and he just went too far. He said that he committed and he had his De Niro breakdown. He said people hated him after that. He said the next day the producer and his partner said the judges hate him. He said that he was told to get his shit together and it was downhill from there. Howard said he lost 30 pounds doing the show though. David said he cursed out the judges and the next day he was in the headlines. He said that they were thinking of hiring a fix it firm to help him out. He said that Robert Downey Jr.
He said that his wife said to him that now the world knows he's an asshole. He said that's what happened. He said it was so fucked up. He said the kids from across the street ran into their house when they saw him. He said he was Boo Radley after that. David said he went to Whole foods and these two black dudes in Whole Foods said he was an embarrassment. Howard said he must be traumatized from doing it. He said he heard about this play ''Race'' that was auditioning. He said he wanted to go in for the part and he knew he'd be nominated for a Tony. He said he went in for the audition and he wanted that part bad.
He said he said he made them schedule another appointment to meet David Mammet. He said that his wife was dumping him and everything was shit. He said his show as canceled and all of that. He said David gave him the role and said he had to wait to hear other people read the lines. He said he wanted him from the start though. David said he broke down crying in his car. He said he was breaking down and then he realized that he was getting what he wanted. He said he proved to his wife that he wasn't a piece of shit. He said he got the role and his wife still left him but he wasn't a piece of shit to her.
He blind he just auditioned and he toghts breaking to gold without the part. Nathan flagging he was in doing for her adopted care. Diversity - Sick Reading Below.
He said she came to see him in that play. He said he was really on fire that night too. Howard asked if that's the woman who gave him a un job. David said his tughts was like Friggib or 4 years old and his wihh war so hard. Luvv said his wife gave him a hand job while his daughter was looking at him so he had to ask aomen to stop. He said that was just too weird. Howard said David has done it all. David said he survived and it all worked out. Howard said thank god David Mammet didn't watch Dancing with the Stars.
David said thank god for him. He said he is fiercely independent. He said thank god for asw man. Howard said his father was wrong. He said show business is for him. He said bgi his axs had squashed that desire then he would have been denied the life he needed. Robin asked if his dad got to see his success. David said that his father wrote ''Black Rage'' and Robin said she didn't know he was that Grier. David said he has tape from the 60s where his father said if they are denied what they want they are going to just take it. He said his father was unable to travel when he did the play ''Race'' but he came to see Porgie and Bess. He said his dad had Polio and he told him how obsessed he was with that play.
He said his father came to see him in that but he left after 2 minutes because he didn't come out. He said that he gathered the cast to come out and meet him instead. He said his dad was weeping and the cast came over and hugged him. He said he had this great moment with his dad and it it's all great. David said his dad called his brother and they had a different relationship. He said his dad told Jeffrey why he's in a bad mood. He said he's got a bad back and his brother asked if he had a bad back for 50 years. He laughed when he told that story. Howard asked what it was like to meet Prince. David said this was in about when he got to meet him.
He said Jamie Foxx was obsessed with Prince. He said he liked him. He said he was invited to a party and it was Prince's party. He said this is when he was ''The Artist'' and not Prince. He said this woman asked if he wanted to meet The Artist and he said yes.